I’ve never regretted buying a plane ticket to spend time with a friend. Not once.
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about friendship.
Maybe it’s because I’m at an age where I can look back over several decades and see which relationships endured. Maybe it’s because I’ve spent so much time traveling and have friends scattered across different states and countries. Or maybe it’s because I’m single and have always known that friendships couldn’t be an afterthought in my life—they had to be something I intentionally invested in.
Whatever the reason, I’ve become convinced that friendship is one of the greatest gifts God gives us.
Life Is Better Together
When I think about the moments that have brought me the most joy, very few involve accomplishments or possessions. They involve people: laughing so hard over dinner that we’re crying, staying up far too late talking about life, celebrating weddings and new babies, exploring new cities together, or simply showing up for one another during life’s harder seasons.
Those moments have taught me that while experiences are wonderful, they’re almost always better when shared. One of the unexpected gifts of friendship is that it pulls us out of ourselves. Friends introduce us to new restaurants, invite us to concerts we might have skipped, encourage us to try something outside our comfort zone, or convince us to say “yes” to an adventure that becomes one of our favorite memories.
Friendship Takes Intention
I’ve also realized that friendships don’t maintain themselves. The older we get, the easier it is to assume everyone is too busy. We mean to call, mean to text, mean to plan a visit, and suddenly a year has gone by.
So I’ve tried—imperfectly—to be the friend who reaches out. I send the text when something reminds me of someone. I put birthdays on my calendar. I mail the card. I plan the lunch. Sometimes I simply pick up the phone and say, “What are you doing in a few months? How would you feel if I came to visit?”
I’ve had more than one friend laugh because they thought I couldn’t possibly be serious. But I was.
Friendship Is Worth the Trip
Some of my favorite trips weren’t planned because they were on my bucket list. They happened because I wanted to spend time with someone I cared about.
I’ve learned that experiencing a place through a friend is completely different from visiting as a tourist. You discover favorite neighborhood restaurants, attend their church, meet the people who matter to them, celebrate milestones together, and see a side of a destination that no guidebook could ever show you.
Those trips have reminded me that sometimes the destination isn’t what makes a journey unforgettable—it’s the people waiting for you when you arrive.
Every Friendship Doesn’t Look the Same
People often say it’s better to have a few close friends than lots of acquaintances. While there’s certainly truth in that, I’ve found that friendship isn’t always an either-or proposition.
Over the years, I’ve been blessed with friends from every chapter of my life—childhood, college, church, work, international travel, missions, and the many communities I’ve been fortunate to be part of. Some are among my closest confidants. Others are dear friends I may only see every year or two. Yet when we’re together, it’s as if no time has passed.
One of my favorite examples is my annual trip to Washington, D.C. Instead of staying in a hotel, I often spend two weeks moving from house to house, staying with several different friends while catching up with many others. Every visit reminds me that relationships are built over years of showing up, staying in touch, and making time for one another.
I’ve learned that friendships don’t all have to fit neatly into the same category. Some are part of everyday life. Others span states, countries, and even continents. Each one has added something unique to my life, and I’m grateful for all of them.
A Simple Reminder
Life gets busy. We all have responsibilities, calendars, and countless reasons to put off reaching out.
But I’ve never regretted making time for a friend.
So send the text. Make the phone call. Invite someone to lunch. Buy the plane ticket. Celebrate the birthday. Be the one who reaches out first.
Years from now, I don’t think we’ll remember most of what we bought.
We’ll remember who walked through life with us.
And if there’s one investment that has paid dividends every single time, it’s investing in the people I love.